- Stephanie Goudreault
Beware of the Codes
It’s been a slice of a week.
We lost a family pet, which is always very hard for us. I feel disgusted with our news outlets (truly they’re not news but propaganda), and all the social media promotions got to me this week. At times, it's hard for me to feel inspired when the world is so broken. I’m constantly reminding myself that we play role in the rebuild of our new paradigm.
This is usually the dialogue that happens; I see the beauty in nature, I see the love in my family, I see the grace in myself… and my mind says: “How can you feel so happy when the world is going up in flames?? Talk about the BS, don’t talk about inspiration or growth. Now is not the time!!”
I wonder how many times I was told this very thing: now is not the time.
You see the words we often hear from ourselves come from our childhood. If we have a parent or grandparents always telling us to: stop talking, your too emotional, not now, stay quiet, be a good girl… our subconscious retains this is its long-term memory, and as an adult, you tell it to yourself all the time. This is one of the main reasons why we stay small in our decisions and stay stuck in the familiar or comfortable, by replaying those same words over and over again.
At such a young age, we were told by the adults WHO to be or WHAT to do. And when we
become adults, we find ourselves repeating the same patterns out of robotism or out of the subconscious.
95% of who we are is learned behavior.
And I believe that’s why a lot of us feel depleted, sad, anxious, unfulfilled, and broken. We never seem to be able to just be ourselves. (Who is that anyway? Do we truly know?)
When we are told WHO to be at such a young age, we don’t discover who we are but who people want us to become - and just stick.
As women, we have been told to man up, to stop crying, to stop being emotional…almost as
if men were more valuable and to be more like them.
Say what? Where does that even come from?
Well, our adult guardians were told the same, and they were told the same… for a few generations at least. (And the family curse appears)
The reality of why from generation to generation women were told the same thing, is that we all hold the same coding.
Coding: a system of principles or rules
Passed on subconsciously from generation to generation.
This is why emotional intelligence, regulation of our nervous systems, and our reactivity to life’s challenges are truly important steps for us and future generations.
As women, we will never see ourselves become the women we aspire to be if we don’t work on any of it. It’s such an important piece to “breaking” the family curse, which is not a curse at all, but a series of codes and programming found deep in the subconscious.
And that ladies, is a good thing because it is something that we can change within ourselves. 🤍